Once, when I was a kid, I overheard a scolding in a supermarket: a little boy was screaming and acting
"ka-razy" in the basket; his mom was at her wits' end. After a few tight-lipped words that concluded with her grabbing some shelf item he'd tossed in the cart behind him, she grabbed his little collar and said softly: "You know, Mommy loves you, but sometimes, she really doesn't like you."
I have remembered that to this day. It horrified me to think that there could be love without liking someone! How could that be? Weren't they the same thing? As I have liked, loved and lived, I have definitely discovered the difference. While like is pure, instant, and real, love can be obligatory, forced, extreme. Like says, "I'm around you because I want to be." Love often says, "I'm around you because I have to be."
In honor of this month full of reasons to think about hearts and red and pink and sweets and gifts and flowers (or poke your eyes out at the thought of it all), I thought I'd share excerpts from one of my favorite books. "I Like You," was written by Sandol Stoddard in 1965, but the message is timeless. I have given this book to only one person, ever, who at the time I absolutely adored. I don't own a copy, as I believe that one should be gifted this simple little story in celebration or recognition of a special relationship. When I found it years ago, it was the "a-ha" moment that clearly illustrated for me, the importance of "like" in love.
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I like you
And I know why I like you because You are a good person To like I like you because When I tell you something special You know it's special And you remember it A long long time You say Remember when you told me Something special And both of us remember When I think something is important You think it's important too When I say something funny You laugh I think I'm funny and You think I'm funny too...
...If I pretend I am drowning
You pretend you are saving me If I am getting ready to pop a paper bag Then you are getting ready to jump That's because You really like me You really like me Don't you? And I really like you back And you like me back And I like you back And that's the way we keep on going Every day If you go away then I go away too Or if I stay home You send me a postcard You don't just say Well see you around Some time Bye I like you a lot because of that......I like you because I don't know why but Everything that happens Is nicer with you I can't remember when I didn't like you It must have been lonesome then I like you because because I forget why I like you But I do So many reasons...
...I would go on choosing you And you would go on choosing me Over and over again That's how it would happen every time I don't know why I guess I don't know why I like you really Why do I like you? I guess I just like you I guess I just like you Because I like you
